Three Good "Nevers"

A wise person told me to avoid using the words “never” and “always” in negative ways when talking to family members. That worthy advice has served me well. Those damaging words “never” and “always” if used in the heat of a word-tussle can inflict harm because they leave no wiggle room for exceptions.

            An angry mom might address a tweener’s failure to put away her wet towels, “You never pick up your towels.” The almost teen has probably put them on the towel rack a few times. If the exception had occurred, that daughter may think poorly of her mom’s word choice. A dad might correct a son’s bad table manners and exaggerate, “You always chew with your mouth open.” You get the drift. If the son had even ONCE chewed with his mouth closed, he’d remember and feel hurt by the overall labeling of him as an open-mouthed muncher.

            Conversely, I read three excellent uses of “never” in the Bible. They astounded me. I’d read them before, but here I am at a different time in life, and they mean more. I love the absolutes that these “nevers” represent: Jesus declared himself the bread of life, and whoever comes to him will “never go hungry,” “never be thirsty,” and he “will never drive them away” (John 6: 35-37).

             The feeding of the 5,000 preceded Jesus speaking these unconditional “nevers.”  A miracle outlined in John 6 (and the three Gospels) reveals the power behind Jesus’ “never” promises: The setting was when Jesus fed 5,000 people (that count didn’t include the women or children). The late afternoon sun glowed. Suppertime neared. Stomachs rumbled and yet, there were too many mouths and not enough food.

            Then, Jesus asked Phillip “Where shall we buy bread for these people to eat?” Philip didn’t have deep pockets, and replied, “Eight months’ wages would not even buy enough bread for each one to have a bite!” (v 5-7). He clearly saw that needs far outreached the resources.

            That’s when the Creator of wheat and all the little fishes in the deep blue sea speeded up processes to bypass the usual seasons of growing and harvesting and baking. God sidestepped around fishing, cleaning, smoking, and drying of seafood. The disciples had found a lad with five meager barley loaves and two small fish, and when Jesus prayed over the skimpy meal, he created fast food that was good for them.

            What a fish story! If kids today eat alphabet soup, the kids that day ate a numerical meal. How can five plus two add up to over 5,000 meals? Pay attention to the crowning glory of that story found in Matthew’s closing remarks, “They all ate and were satisfied, and the disciples picked up twelve basketfuls of broken pieces of bread and fish” (Matthew 14:20). After those leftovers were stored away is when Jesus spoke three “nevers.”

            The supernatural growth of bread and fish displayed God’s power that backed up  all of Jesus’ claims and promises.  Imagine yourself in that crowd with a family of eight to feed. Remember, family chefs, your entire family had eaten supper, and you did no shopping, no cooking, no dishes, no cleanup. Besides that, no whines were uttered, “I don’t like miracle bread and fish,” because “all ate and were satisfied.”

            Then Jesus spoke three breath-taking promises: never hungry, never thirsty, or never driven away. The temporary gift of bread fed the hungry for that day. However, Jesus offered more than casual dining; he offered to feed them for an entire lifetime. He could become to each a lifelong feast instead of a supplement. He wanted the position of chef and life-healer to individuals and nations.   

            Needs often stretch beyond resources. That’s when humble people look to gracious Jesus because he takes care of physical needs and offers soul-deep sustenance. We can’t do it on our own, no matter how much we stress, worry, or try to make things happen. He alone nurtures nations and souls as they trust in his power-backed three “nevers”: never hunger, never thirst, and never driven away (John 6:35-37).

            Comments welcome at www.cathymessecar.com

            Hunger for Humility (22): “If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land” (2 Chronicles 7:14).

Do You Recycle Compliments?

“I can live two months on a good compliment,” said Mark Twain.

            When very young and I received a compliment, I’d blush to the roots of my natural blond hair. However, I now see that compliments need to move on – not held in store so I can feast upon my supposed “greatness.” Read further to find how compliments should move on.

            As you know, we’re working our way through Jeremy Taylor’s (1613-1667) nineteen rules for humility in this year’s columns. We’re now on the seventh which states in the language of his day: “When thou hast said or done anything for which thou receivest praise or estimation, take it indifferently, and return it to God.” He goes on to recommend “reflecting upon [God] as the giver of the gift, or the blesser of the action, or the aid of the design; and give God thanks for making thee an instrument of his glory, for the benefit of others.”

            Couched within the seventh rule, I find Taylor suggesting that compliments move on and recycle back to God. This week, I’ve spent time considering compliments, and I’ve discovered at least three phases of recycling them. First, compliments help us realize our gifts and potential. Early in life, I found that a friend or colleague might recognize a talent or a personal gift of mine, one of which I wasn’t fully aware. Their compliments helped me to recognize the talent and with God’s help to nurture that talent beyond the bud stage.

            As I look back over my life, I remember those who encouraged my writing. I specifically remember a high school English teacher, who asked permission to keep one of my assignments to share in future years with her classes. We were to write an epitaph for one of the fictional characters from the classic literature we’d studied that year. My teacher gave us the option of a one-page epitaph. I chose the book “Silas Marner,” by George Elliot and wrote about the book’s namesake. I received direction from that early praise, but I didn’t know to give it back to God.  

            Second, as we age and learn about humility, that learning doesn’t mean we know to recycle an accolade back to God. I knew in my heart, when someone praised something I’d done, that an expressed admiration didn’t solely belong to me, but I wasn’t making a practice of giving the praise back to God and thanking him. I knew that nothing I did or would ever accomplish came from my efforts alone. I had nothing to do with my birth, body, or makeup—mind, personality, or talents. At this stage, when someone congratulated me on an accomplishment, I’d stammer and mumble something about the Lord’s help, then I’d secretly file the approval, and when life turned sour, I’d drag out the compliment and gnaw on it like an old bone.

            Third, when humility roots and rules, it’s easier to receive compliments. At times, we know that giving God public praise is the thing to do. I love to see public praise on  television when a hero saves someone from tragedy and they choose to give God the praise for their courage or quick thinking.

            A simple “Thank you” will do after receiving a compliment. If a compliment comes from a fellow Jesus follower, they know the gift isn’t yours to claim. The receiving of a compliment becomes less stressful or embarrassing when one can recycle the compliment back to God at the very moment received or at the end of the day during quiet vespers.

            Our Creator assembled each unique person and designed a specific path for each to follow. In our hearts, when we turn praises back into our Father’s keeping, we perform a private act of humility. For everything we are or have comes from God.

            He is the Creator.

            He is the Composer.

            He arranges the music.

            We are instruments.

            Hunger for Humility (21): “How can you believe if you accept praise from one another, yet make no effort to obtain the praise that comes from the only God?” (John 5:44)

            Comments welcome at www.cathymessecar.com

Moms, Who Slay Dragons

Rubber boots on and lunch pail in hand, my son left for work. After a goodbye kiss he trotted toward his tricycle. My four-year-old son Russell pretended to go to work, like his daddy. I went back inside my home, but within ten seconds the back door flew open, and Russell's ashen face appeared.

     “A snake, a snake!” he shouted. Following his point, I saw a water moccasin coiled by our whitewashed gate. I had a shovel handy and slew the reptile, but my son’s fear of snakes intensified that day.

     Several years later when Russell was eleven, he gave me a handmade card. The front declared “HAPPY MAMA’S DAY.” He penned this message inside: “Dear Mom, Thank You For Killing The Snake When I Was Four Years Old! Happy Mother’s Day.” In the lower left corner he drew a huge star and labeled me a “GOLD STAR SPORT.”

     Even though my children are adults, I keep dogging their Enemy, “that ancient serpent called the devil” or the “great dragon” (Revelation 12:9). Praying for children remains a mother’s lifetime calling, a privileged humble activity. When mine were toddlers, I got up in the middle of cold nights and tiptoed into their rooms to pray and make blanket checks. During the teenage years, I quietly went into their rooms to pray as they slept. Often, when they were away from home, elementary school to college, I went into their rooms, sat on their beds and prayed for my son and daughter.

     Blanketing these adult children with prayer is now a priority. Even if I’m miles away physically or in our relationship, I can still touch their worlds and influence the chapters in their new families. Petitions from moms, dads, and grandparents prompt God to move obstacles, draw road maps, or instill peace.

     On my grandmother’s very last visit to my mom’s house, their physical roles reversed. One evening, Mom helped Grandma put on her nightclothes. Then Dad lifted my wheelchair-bound grandmother onto the bed. Afterward Mom fussed over her, smoothed the bedding and kissed her good night.

     A little later when Mom walked through the dark hallway, she heard Grandmother speaking softly. Mom peeked in to see if she was okay and found Grandmother wasn't talking to herself. She was speaking to her Father, praying for her adult children by name. Feeble in body, but strong with a mother’s spirit, she was slaying dragons.

Hunger for humility (19): “The great dragon was hurled down—that ancient serpent called the devil or Satan, who leads the whole world astray” (Revelation 12:9).

Prayer Walking--Not a Gimmick

A church of my childhood hosted a VBS and advertised in the community. The handout consisted of a white cardboard church building with times and dates and a plastic strip attached to the paper. When I dragged my thumbnail across the strip, it emitted a high-pitched sound saying the name of our church -- a gimmick from the 1960s.

            Junior high students enjoyed going door-to-door and giving those out as we invited neighbors to summer Bible classes. I don’t know if the squeaky speaking strip fascinated potential visitors or just the young teenagers. Another way to reach a community about the good news of Jesus Christ is the humble acts of prayer walking.

            Prayer walking may be new to some Christians. It’s not a gimmick. We’ve probably all done it at one time or another whether we labeled it as such or not: walking a hospital hall -- praying. Walking in your home -- praying. Riding in a car – praying.

            However, planned prayer walking is an effort in proximity. Navpress PrayKids newsletter describes prayer walking as “getting nearer to pray clearer.” On-site praying exercises selfless prayer. Walk a basketball court in your neighborhood, praying for the players. Walk the perimeter of your workplace, inviting God’s presence. Walk near a county jail and pray for inmates. Skilled nursing centers, the courthouse, or police and fire departments—give thanks for medical professionals and public servants. Pray for calm in their lives and recipients.

            God can hear requests for Bulgaria from a New York apartment, so prayer walking is not for God’s benefit. We don’t have to stand in an exact place to ask God’s grace. The walking and praying benefits both the pray-er and the prayed-for. 

            A forward-thinking scripture to pray is that people will recognize Jesus and that the time will soon arrive when “every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father” (Philippians 2:10-11).    

            At the unemployment office, pray for those out of work. Pray at a military base or anytime you see the familiar camouflage fatigues of troops in airports or malls. At a movie theater, pray for godly entertainment. Find the highpoint in a city and pray for Christians to light the community. Walking through your day, watch for countenances that seem stricken with worry, bless the bearers with a silent prayer. At a senior citizen center, pray for the elderly.

            In the movie “Sarah, Plain and Tall,” widower Jacob Whiting placed an ad in a newspaper, for a wife and mother: “someone who will make a difference.” Every person on earth could benefit from “someone who will make a difference.”

            Pray near church campuses in your community asking for unity. At popular night spots, pray for the singles in the city. At tax offices pray for wise use of taxpayers’ funds. As you walk the street past your neighbors, pray for peace in their families.

            When a person or group prayer-walks, the act is not an attention-grabbing public spectacle. It’s a private stroll, a practice in humility, much like the setting of the Garden of Eden when God met and talked with Adam and Eve in “the cool of the evening.” Prayer says, “I can’t do enough, be enough, or earn enough to make things better in this world, Lord. I need your supernatural help.” 

            This week, wherever you walk—business, pleasure, or errands—notice your surroundings and in humility pray for your “neighbors.”    

            Hunger for Humility (16): “The Lord bestows favor and honor; no good thing does he withhold from those whose walk is blameless” (Psalm 84:11).

            Comments welcome www.cathymessecar.com

Don't Finagle Conversations

Right before the tornados hit the Dallas area last week my connecting flight left DFW Airport for Nashville, Tennessee. Soon, the winds favorably brought me within the embrace of friends’ arms, John and Beverly. We first met in 2006, and through the convenience of Email, cell phones, Facebook, and blog posts, we’ve kept in touch and become close friends. I spent three nights and days with them while Bev and I worked on a year’s worth of daily devotionals she wrote for cancer patients and family members, and caregivers.

            Later, I listened as Beverly talked with her doctor and described our conversations as “soul searching.” Some of them were. They had to be. You see, Beverly is at the tail end of eight years of fighting abdominal cancer. She’s endured five surgeries and additional stents and ports implanted. After undergoing three FDA approved chemo treatments and five experimental trials, she hopes her efforts will assist in curing her cancer and aid others.

            Without giving you intimate details, allow me to say that Beverly remains one of the brightest, strongest, and most positive women I know. Her humility and reliance on God astounds me. Her honest airing of her feelings refresh me. A female version of Job, even miserable in her skin, she refuses to say God has cursed her. She continually praises him.

            She has lost her hair numerous times, along with her fingernails, eyebrows, and eyelashes. With poise, she has endured indignities for the sake of future cancer patients -- indeed her willingness may save you or someone you love.

            I gave you the background of our friendship and her struggles to assist in introducing Jeremy Taylor’s (1613-1667) sixth rule for living humbly. In the language of his day, “Never speak anything directly tending to thy praise or glory; that is, with the purpose to be commended.”

            Through Beverly, I know exactly what Mr. Taylor wrote about in rule number six. Oftentimes, an opportunity might arise in conversation to spotlight some good deed she has done. However, Beverly needs no attention – no public applause. The heavenly Father knows all her charitable thoughts and deeds, and he generously rewards all who seek his praise alone. She remains content with God’s praise alone.

            How would it feel to go one week without compliments from others? Would you starve for affirmation? Why isn’t it enough for God alone to know about the times we succeed in charity? Yikes, I shudder to think how often I’ve thrown sparkle dust in a conversation about myself, so others would ask about my current works. In “Soul Work: Confessions of a Part-Time Monk,” Professor Randy Harris writes about power play in language. He says that postmodern theologians and philosophers believe that almost anything we say is an attempt at power play, to get the upper hand. He says he will not go that far in his assessment of our conversations. However, he does believe this, “We manipulate people and conversations to come out in a way that is agreeable to us.” Some examples are times that people ask us difficult questions: we answer how we want to, and avoid a direct answer or indictment of ourselves.

            Harris goes on to say, “We manipulate conversations to stroke our egos.” Have you ever tried to move a conversation into an area of your expertise? Alternatively, another example, if you receive a compliment on organizational skills, do you point to a messy area showing the messy flipside of your life? Then the complimentary person feels compelled to build you up by lavishing more kudos on your managerial skills? When receiving a compliment, it’s best to simply say, “Thank you,” and let the compliment float away. At home and in business, it’s sometimes necessary to communicate what we do, but always check your motives, don’t let praise from others be the design of your heart. It’s no wonder that so many Bible scriptures advise “silence.” Jesus reminds those who had ulterior motives, “For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of” (Matthew 12:34).

            My friend Beverly writes about her cancer journey at “John’s Wife,” (Blogspot), not for compliments or applause, instead she writes to help others grace their own turbulent storms. This week pay attention to your conversations. Listen a lot, that alone guarantees less language faux pas.

            Hunger for Humility (15): “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak” (James 1:19).

            Comments welcomeher or at www.cathymessecar.com  

Light Always Wins

During the last week of Jesus’ life on earth, there are references in the gospels about darkness, both nighttime and an evil blackness. Historical documents also mention the three hours of unnatural darkness while Christ was on the cross, one even written by Pontius Pilate.

            The elements that came together and brought about the crucifixion of Jesus included folk with dark evil souls. Judas, one of Jesus’ closest companions, showed his true color. When Jesus and the disciples gathered for the last supper, the Master said, “One of you is going to betray me.” Startled by his announcement, the disciples wanted to know which one of them would do so. Jesus identified Judas as the betrayer.

            “Then, dipping the piece of bread, he gave it to Judas Iscariot.  . . . As soon as Judas took the bread Satan entered into him” (John 13:26, 27). Judas then left the upper room and the Apostle John closes the scene by writing, “And it was night.”

            In Gethsemane, Judas assisted in identifying Jesus to the unruly crowd, and the Son of God was arrested under the cover of darkness. That night Jesus said to his captors, “Every day I was with you in the temple courts, and you did not lay a hand on me. But this is your hour—when darkness reigns” (Luke 22:53).

            The next day throughout a bright morning, Jesus hung on a cross, but then a solemn darkness settled over the earth at noon. Crucified about nine in the morning, Jesus was on the cross for six hours, and during the final three hours, an abnormal “darkness came over the whole land until the ninth hour, for the sun stopped shining” (Luke 23:44).

            Through correspondence, independent witnesses later corroborated that the sun didn’t illuminate the earth for three hours. Tertullian wrote to the Roman senator Proculus: “The light of day was withdrawn, when the sun at the very time was in his meridian blaze . . . you yourselves have the account of the world-portent still in your archives!”

            Another account of the withdrawal of sunlight is in a report Pontius Pilate sent to Tiberius, emperor of Rome. “There was a darkness over the whole earth, the sun having been completely hidden, and the heaven appearing dark, so that the stars appeared.”

            Pilate further wrote, “I suppose your reverence is not ignorant of, because in all the world they lighted lamps from the sixth hour until evening.” He also wrote “the moon, being like blood, did not shine the whole night, and yet she happened to be at the full.” The unusual darkness must have been unnerving, frightening. Did God clothe the cross in darkness because he couldn’t bear the world gawking any longer upon the suffering perfect Son? 

            On that long ago Sunday at dawn, when devoted women went to Jesus’ tomb an angel said to them, “Do not be afraid, for I know that you are looking for Jesus, who was crucified. He is not here; he has risen, just as he said” (28:1, 5, 6).

            Centuries before Jesus came to earth, Isaiah prophesied: “The people living in darkness have seen a great light; on those living in the land of the shadow of death a light has dawned.” The refreshment of a clean start is the promise made at the empty tomb of Jesus. 

            From the cradle to the cross, read Jesus’ story. His total goodness has a way of shining into dark secrets and dispelling shadows. God draped darkness over the evil deeds of the cross, but Sunday dawned and Jesus rose from the dead, proving his power and giving us hope.

            Light always wins. Light always overcomes darkness.

            Hunger for Humility (14) “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me (John 14:6).

      

Who's Chiseling Jesus?

In 1495 in a convent dining room in Milan, Italy, Leonardo da Vinci, dipped the bristles of his brush into paint and began a masterpiece high upon the wall. This began his commissioned work of the last supper, 15 by 29 feet, covering an entire wall. A known procrastinator, he finished three years later.

            His art, on that occasion was not the only portrayal of Christ at the last supper. However, Leonardo’s Last Supper wins acclaim as the first depiction to show the disciples displaying real emotions. The scene records his interpretation of the disciples’ reactions to Jesus’ announcement that one of the twelve would betray him. Their collective countenances reflect questions, appall, and denial. 

            Over the years, the painting gradually deteriorated as paint flaked and dirt and grime settled upon it. Further damage occurred when a construction worker stood in the room behind the painted wall. Not quite aware of his exact location in the convent, he proceeded to open up a wall for a doorway. He chiseled out the opening about mid-center of the wall, pushed plaster aside, and when he walked through his roughhewn doorway, he discovered he had ripped out the bottom portion of the painting that showed Jesus’ feet beneath the table.

            In Leonardo’s Last Supper, the disciples focus on the central figure of Jesus, very fitting. The apostle Paul wrote about that meal: “The Lord Jesus on the night he was betrayed, took bread, and when he had given thanks, he broke it and said, ‘This is my body, which is for you; do this in remembrance of me’” (1 Corinthians 11:23).

            Some Christians eat this “remembrance” supper each Sunday, while others do so at regular intervals or gatherings such as funerals and weddings. Each time Jesus meets believers at the table, the mutual time together offers opportunities for believers to look to the past, to the future and inward.

            Looking back one might choose to remember the everyday Jesus, who brushed tears away with his fingertips, nurtured whole villages, or chucked children under their chins and held them in his lap. In addition, one might remember his ultimate sacrifice, his display of forgiveness to those who harmed him, and his call for his followers to forgive as he did.

            Looking forward one might choose to pray for more workers as Jesus instructed, or pray for revival of goodness and honoring of God among humankind. Pray the movement forward that Jesus’ loving kindness could invade homes, churches, communities, governments, workplaces, and schools, so peace remains prevalent. Pray a better world forward where purity and peace prevails. Pray that Jesus becomes the standard for imitation not Hollywood.  

            Finally, during the meal with Jesus, look inward for traces of betrayal of the best friend you could ever have. Search to find out if Jesus’ example is the standard for your personal behavior. Explore your thought life. Does pride reign there, or humility, considering others before self? 

            Like the construction worker, we can chisel away at the image of Christ in us, until we no longer resemble our Savior. Consider this: “Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me (Revelations 3:20). Written to believers, not unbelievers, what’s the key to answering his knock on our doors? From relationship and feeding on the Holy Bible, know his voice, his prompts, his way, and always leave the door unlatched for easy entrance.

            Happy Palm Sunday.

            Hunger for Humility (12): “Christ in you, the hope of glory.” (Colossians 1:27)